Waiting for a miracle

My immune system is now about two months old. Which means I’m always sick. I have to get back all the antibodies I have lost. And I have to get my immunizations again. In the meantime they told me my symptoms would be worse at first. Holy cow were they not lying. My symptoms are so bad I cannot walk even with my Walker. This is supposed to be totally normal but I feel horrible. It is hard waiting for a miracle that happened when your multiple sclerosis symptoms were worse than they were when you got stem cell treatment! I have to just wait. I have to just be patient. I know it is going to take a lot of time. But I’ve had multiple sclerosis 20 years and I am 36 years old I am ready for my life to start. I miss my own hair.

Now this is a picture of my real hair

It’s just not the same if you’re a girl. Our  hair is an extension of Who We Are., you truly have to see the inner beauty when you don’t have any hair as a woman. I’m just feeling very down today. My family and friends. Raised  so much money for me to get stem cells. And it is just discouraging when you feel worse than you did before you left for Mexico. I have to just stick with it. This is part of the plan. I have to keep telling myself time takes time. Be patient. Just wait. I feel bad for others in my family who I can’t help do anything around the house anymore and that used to. It has to be hard on them too. Hopefully as the months go I will have better reports. Right now I just need to know how to hang on and lift my spirits. I know so many people in the world have it so much worse than me. I shouldn’t be complaining.

Peace and love Laurelin 

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