I am sorry.

I deleted the last Blog because someone took it personally. That is never my intention, with any of my blogs. My blogs are always meant for all of humanity. I would never single out a certain person. Things happen in my life ,like they happen in other people’s lives, that make me think of things and then I write a blog about it. For example, it was a Blog about how everyone tells me what to do with my multiple sclerosis. I know I must be quarantine for a while due to my stem cells growing. I need to give my body time to grow a new immune system. Meanwhile, people seem to know what I need to do while I’m letting my immune system grow. No caffeine. No granulated white sugar. No uncooked vegetables. No restaurant food for three months. Certain drugs I should go back on ,or certain drugs I should try that may help me more. Get lots of sleep. I have severe insomnia and I like the night time. I cannot live without my two cups of coffee in the morning. I am addicted to sugar and I cannot help it. I am always hungry late at night and I eat the most then. I’m not supposed to smoke. I am working on that one especially. The point is ,in life I know people mean well. I still need to feel like I’m having a life. My life for six years has been the floor of my bedroom. I just can’t wait for stem cells to start working and to be able to move around my house. I love you all so much including my doctors. But I can’t always listen to all of you. My life would be absolutely miserable. I know I am supposed to catheterize. I’ve been supposed to for over 10 years. But I am more comfortable wearing pads and taking my risk. My bladder has been working better,  which gives me hope that perhaps the stem cells are beginning to work. But in the meantime ,I am sorry but my vices  probably will continue. Please forgive me. I know it is wrong ,but I has to feel like I’m living. So I cheat a little. 

Peace and love Laurelin 

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